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Happy Election Day [20 Jan 2009|01:50pm]
"Especially important is that bourgeois democracy gives the workers the illusion that they control the society, that they are free, self-governing people. So every two to four years the people go to the polls and pick one of two agents of the rich to rule over them. Then they go to work and take orders from unelected bosses for the rest of the time."
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thungs [20 Aug 2008|02:10am]
i turned 30 on august 4th.
presents that i want:
1.a tatoo on my head (maybe something tank-girl related, but not sexist.. maybe the tank- in color and designed with my friend megan.. a sentient, silly, powerful and potent tank.. and queer.. and it has to be a tank that is seriousish sometimes.. or rather, it is serious to me or at least i aspire to it.. but i also maybe want/need something loving/sillyish to go with it.. or maybe 3 things cuz i prefer triads to biads.. )
2.a set of bicycle wheels
3.a bicycle
4.land
5.help finding health
6.help finding a martial arts teacher
7.thai fisherman pants
7.5 a nose ring and piercing
8.kisses - at least some of them have to be make-out kisses..
2 comments|post comment

shit [31 Dec 2007|12:52am]
im sad.. my mom is in trouble.. she is being drugged and abused, but i dont know what to do.. they aremaking it hard for her to live.. cuz they say that she is crazy. fuck..

fuck, fuck, fuck..
2 comments|post comment

important- [12 Nov 2007|02:22am]
Salt Lake City: Bikehouse Squat Needs Help
Saturday, November 10 2007 @ 02:42 PM PST
Contributed by: Anonymous

The Bike House is a squat thats been active for close to 5 years in downtown Salt Lake City. It was founded in March 2003 by a group of kids looking to save the world, well at least their own lives from the mediocrity of modern life and the life of a community suffering from crippling poverty. The property was discovered and the boards taken off the windows and the house reclaimed.

Salt Lake City: Bikehouse Squat Needs Help

The Bike House is a squat thats been active for close to 5 years in downtown Salt Lake City. It was founded in March 2003 by a group of kids looking to save the world, well at least their own lives from the mediocrity of modern life and the life of a community suffering from crippling poverty. The property was discovered and the boards taken off the windows and the house reclaimed. The only livable section of the house was one room in the back. As the years progressed we opened the entire house while replacing walls, rebuilding the floors, building rooms, laying concrete, fixing pipes, painting the house, basically rebuilding this abandoned, forgotten, dilapidated building and turning it into a positive space aimed at making positive change in the world. this was a place where inspired kids lived inspirational lives that really affected and touched the people around them.

Think about all the ideas, actions, protests, local movements, and changed lives that actually took effect through conversations and meetings at this house. The end result has proven staggering. also travelers from all over the country were welcomed to stay, and over the years we've met hundreds of kids that way.

The bike house was a home for us and a home away from home for many other people.

Fast forward to September 2007.

This house has kept its DIY ethic, at the same time remaining a home for several people. While the lineup has changed drastically over the years, the spirit remains the same. After catching up on the property's back taxes, keeping up with the current property tax, and remodeling this left for dead building, the landlord unexpectedly showed up.

Basically it was "thanks for paying my bills and fixing my house, now I can sell it." While that possibility was always in the back of our minds, we never thought we would see the day. If we had lived here for just two more short years the house would have been legally ours by adverse possession.

Now this motherfucker wants to cash in on our collective years of effort and leave us without the home we all built.

Legally he can take the house from us, the house he threw away over 5 years ago. Is it moral? His only interest is money.

In December we are taking a stand.

We will push this as far as we can, taking this away from us will not be easy. This isn't only for us, this is for a community, this is to raise awareness of housing issues and the realities of poverty. This is about saying "fuck you" to the ones who try to profit off our basic needs.

The house is lost, but the fight isn't over.

This is where you come in. this is a call for help to anyone and everyone who has been involved with the Bikehouse one way or another over the past 5 years,

This is even a call for help to those of you who may have just found out about this place,

We need your support! the goal is to fill this house with as many people as possible so if he wants to force us out he will have to take us all on.

This is a once in a lifetime chance to be on the front lines of a worthwhile fight against a man motivated by greed and the police that protect him.

This is going to be huge. who knows what will happen but we'd like everyone to come take part in the cathartic destruction of the house, because we're not going quietly.

If you don't want to participate the least you can do is read the story, absorb it, and pass it on. think about the hundreds if not thousands of abandoned buildings in your city

That could be put to use for something positive and strong. think about the homeless that flood your streets because our "authorities" wont let them stay in thrown away houses.

And finally think about all those motherfuckers with more space and material items then they know what to do with but never reach out to help.

This isn't only about a physical structure, this is about a feeling, a feeling that we can take with us and an experience that can change the world around us,

And the symbolism of the hope and passion of a few revolutionary kids against the heartless face of authority.


IF YOU ARE INTERESTED, CONTACT ME! THIS EVENT WILL TAKE PLACE SHORTLY AFTER THE 10TH OF DECEMBER. REPOST PLEASE!!

e-mail Chris.

[xburningdiamondsx] [at] [hotmail] [dot] [com]

Thank you for your time.
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bliss [10 Nov 2007|07:58pm]
howdy all,

im feeling super wonderful.. ive made some decisions and feel like im growing and capable of change..

and i really want to find an awesome hat.. something warmish and maybe with a bill.. any ideas?

im also full of lots of love right now..

kisses (besitos)
4 comments|post comment

????? [28 Apr 2007|07:01pm]
currently in vienna (austria).. feelin weak, saddish, and emptyish.. tomorrow i bike to linz.. (180 km west of vienna) with a broken bicycle that i fixed.. and then i bike back on wednesday.. unless the bike explodes.. and fly to new york on thurs.. ive been driftig for a while.. earlier today, i thought about how i need to be more grounded.. and reading through my previous entries reminded me that i need my friends.. and need to get out of my own head and be a friend to others.. sparkles.. i havent worn glitter or sparkles in quite a while.. or a skirt.. how silly of me..

does anyone have suggestions on where i should move to? i need to find a place with a good martial arts instructor..
7 comments|post comment

a recognition of sorts. no, definitely at least a recognition [06 Aug 2006|05:30am]
i had an amazing night.. truly amazing.. so much encouragement and support.. so much affirmation of my being.. some people were really impressed.. two people told me that they love me.. they love me.. thats intense.. someone tried to make out with me and look underneath my skirt.. my reaction: jump and climb up the fire escape.. using the fire escape to flee into the house.. to flee from danger.. maybe i am beautiful.. oh fuck.. aint no maybes about it.. love... love... love..
love.. love.. love..

love,
sigh
4 comments|post comment

[13 Jan 2006|09:57am]
we had a 'progressive' party last night.. there were different themes in every room and we 'progressed' from room to room.. one room had everyone sit in a circle and massage the person to the left and then to the right.. for one room, we had to take most of our clothes off before entering.. and we entered to discover a giant inflatable pool filled with warm water.. i think there were 15-20 people in it.. i woke up an hour or so ago in the third floor hallway of black elk.. sans clothes.. it took me a long time to write this.. or maybe it seems that way.. i cant say for sure.. our room was mellow.. burning sage, candles, fresh raw juice.. my favorite juice was apples, beets, and ginger.. i prefer it without carrot.. fortunately there were leftovers and i was able to drink that this mornig.. helped a lot.. plus peppermint tea.. and i have an extra pack in my back pocket.. and fortunately when i took off my pants to go to the pool, i put them far away in th ebasement--which meant ---- >> clean pants in the morning.. im at work right now.. i smell vomit but i ran into a friend on the street and she didn't smell anything.. so perhaps its in my nasal cavaties.. i think that i threw up a lot.. i honestly dont remember.. made out with gabe.. sort of.. too rushed.. too drunken.. but there was tongue.. so i guess i go on the kissing chart.. i want to kiss a woman as well.. had a theory yesterday.. that im more intimidated by women, more afraid to show affection towards them, so i show it towards males more.. but in a lot of ways, i think that im more attracted to women.. differencse and such.. yknow?? but i feel that the three person relationship idea i had is the best one.. that would be wonderful.. a full relationship with walking, sunrise watching, snuggling, holding, talking, tea drinking, smiling, kissing.. three people.. it feels right to me.. less isolating than a two pers0n relationship..

i live in a magical place filled with magical people..
2 comments|post comment

[05 Jan 2006|09:05am]
hung out with someone last night.. a date?? possibly.. bicycled.. walked.. climbed a tree together.. he sang to me in the tree.. beautiful voice.. slowly crept closer to me.. put his hand on my chest and sang about release.. ran his fingers across my forehead, down the bridge of my nose.. im very good at not responding to signals or possibly making people feel turned down.. if these were indeed signals.. im too afraid.. am i attracted to boys? am i attracted to him..? hes beautiful, sensitive, creative.. am i too twisted and fucked up to really feel anything..? am i too dull and non-passionate to really feel anything..? im afraid that i dont deserve the attention.. that im not good enough.. i need help.. if im ever to kiss someone again (not probable), id like my first time to be in a tree.. snuck away from him last night so i didnt have to say goodnight..

why do i sabotage myself and my interactions.. im a little sad..

hes a good person but i feel that im not good enough to notice enough about him..

sigh.. i want to explore teh 3 person connection more.. nmaybe that would feel right..

he told me about a wet dream he had.. a giant pregnant belly.. a growing green light arose inside of it.. light grew in intensity.. he tried to understand it and then recognized that it was alive.. the light was alive.. and then he ejaculated once he made that recognition.. he described the dream with much more intensity.. intriguing.. maybe this suggests that sex doesnt have the same shallow significance for him that it does for so many others.. which is what i ..
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[31 Dec 2005|08:43am]
dreamt of resistance all of last night.. people running through the streets.. fire?? interesting.. good..

drove with friends to toledo yesterday.. hung out with some anarchists in an unused apartment.. sat on the floor.. tired.. bored.. for hours.. went to the collingwood artist colony.. tamer than i thought.. those we wanted to see there not there.. but beautiful art.. nice to think of real artists, or rather those who actively create congregated 2gether.. was wondering if i should have stayed at home.. than we went to the art museum... we had 13 minutes before they closed.. so we rushed in.. i partnered off with my friend megan.. we linked arms and ran through.. stopping to peruse those pieces which affected us.. piqued our interests.. its a wonderful way to view art.. linked to another.. physical contact.. the physical linkingalso allowed for shared experiences of the art.. similar frames of references, distance, etc.. art art art.. those 13 minutes made the night.. afterwords, joined arms with our friend ben and the three of us walked sideways to the outsides.. sawa atree.. jumped up and climbed a rounn.d.. 13 minutes made my night.. tis grand.. owning myt time and myexperience..s..

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
a few nights ago.. hanging out with some wonderful and cute people (a 'boy' and a 'girl') maybe helped me to understand my sexuality more.. i like the dynamics of interaction with three.. and id like to be in a relationship with 2 others (a 'man' and a 'woman').. a trio? not just a sexual interact9oin.. thats of lesser importance to me right now (probably cuz ive never really experienced the affects of 'real' sex before,the connecting and closening, ???) but a relationship. drawing tgether, swimming, encouraging.. etc..

does anyone have experience with these types of relationships?? not just sexual but fully encompassing'??
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[28 Dec 2005|10:50am]
feelin tremendously better today.. my friends and my house rejuvenate me.. and i feel that i reciprocate and strengthen those around me as well..

sometimes i am strong.. sometimes i am weak and afraid.. fortunately, though, i have friends.. good, welcoming, amazing friends.. who make me feel wonderful about being who i am.. and help me to see my beauty..

and i have a right to see my beauty..
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[27 Dec 2005|07:48am]
frustrating.
sad.

in general.

a specific tale:

i was biking home last night and some asshole in a hummer yelled at me to get out of the road and then called me queer. it really upset me. its so hard to be free and open when there are so many scary assholes. i want people to hug me and encourage me to be happy and alive. urghh. watched a wonderful film: oranges are not the only fruit. its partially about fighting to be who you want to be. i want to play it at black elk thursday if anyone is interested. im going to practice kicking again tonight. makes me happy. and id like to be able to defend myself.

right now, i dont want to understand where the man in the hummer is coming from. i would have in the past. would have re-examined this whole situation and not been so swept up by it. im tired right now. and its easier to say fuck him. but i need to recontextualize it (i dont know if thats the phrase im looking for) so that i can better have control over the emotions that i generate.. maybe.. im not sure what im saying right now. not exactly. possibly not at all.
i feel a bit disconnected from words.. and stuff..

i just need someone to cuddle with for hours.. no words.. just holding and being held.. butim afraid to cuddle.. so i cant be helped.. sigh.. thats not me writing my name.. thats me sighing.. sigh.. sigh.. sigh..
7 comments|post comment

[07 Nov 2005|10:28pm]
this is really good:

the end

TRANSCRIPT of "If Voting Changed Anything", spoken word by Jello Biafra
from Jello Biafra's album: _I Blow Minds for a Living_
also on: _The Bat is Back--An Alternative Tentacles Record Sampler_
(date? sometime after Pete Wilson being elected as CA governor...)
--


How many of you out there think this country's a democracy?

Or is it really more of a one-party state masquerading as a two-party
state? The Democrats are on the inside what the Republicans are on
the outside--each having almost identical financial backers to grease
all the appropriate orifices and holes.

So maybe it is no surprise that Ron Brown, head of the Democratic
National Committee and a Jesse Jackson protegee, has announced a Fall
Democratic Party endorsement for Bush's war against Saddam Hussein...

Did you VOTE for the Pentagon?
Did you VOTE for Wall Street?
Did you VOTE for a nuclear arms race?
Did you VOTE for the CIA?
Ever try reading the _Bill of Rights_ to a cop?

People didn't vote for "Star Wars."
People didn't vote for "Drug Wars."
People didn't vote for acid rain.
Noone voted for being homeless.
Hardly anyone in this country votes at all anymore...

Meanwhile, people in places like China and South Africa are out there
dying just for the right to vote.

But in America, people take it for granted and they just pout and they
stay home: figuring [that] their wishes aren't respected anyway.

They don't make people like the popular myth of JFK any more.
They don't make people like Martin Luther King any more.
(And if they did, the cops would just kill 'em anyway.)

So why bother? Doesn't matter.
As the spray paint on the wall so often says: "If voting changed
anything, they'd make it illegal."


After all, if the will of the majority of the eligible, or even the
registered, voters in this country were really respected, guess who'd
be President right now?

NOBODY! Noone would be President! Noone would be Senator! Noone
would be Governor! And probably noone would be D.A. or Mayor, either!

The White House would be occupied by Nobody...'cept maybe a few
homeless people tired of freezing across the street.
Capitol Hill would be accountable to Nobody. (Is that such a radical change?)

"None of the above" came in second for senator in the Republican
primary in Nevada last June. And it seems to me [that] there's a
similar reason why DEAD people keep winning local elections.

How many of you pay taxes?

Confess. Confess.
I pay taxes. I confess.

And the only reason I pay taxes is out of fear of getting busted for
not paying taxes.

But I would GLADLY pay those taxes, and maybe quite a bit more when I could,
if I knew that money were being used for real needs of real people.

And I went on vote strike for years myself. But I got talked back into it for
this reason: local ballot initiatives...state ballot initiatives.

Like:
"Yes or no on rent control"...
"Yes or no on domestic partners"...
"Yes or no on pollution control."

Things that we can decide for ourselves because the people we put in power are
too chicken to do it on their own.

Urban renewal and youth centers instead of "Drug Wars" and Nazis with guns and
boot camps.

And, [another reason to vote] keeping Bible-thumping bigots from sneaking onto
your local school boards...

And, who can deny how delicious it tastes to vote down another sports stadium?

And just imagine what COULD HAPPEN if there was a spot on every office on
every ballot where you could check off "None of the Above"!!!

And if "None of the Above" came in first, they would have to have a special
election like they do when a congressman dies or resigns or something...and
only NEW CANDIDATES could run...instead of the bozos that got rejected the
first time.

Think of the possibilities. We already vote "yes or no" on judges.
Do you think Rehnquist and his creepy crew would be so sadistic towards our
daily lives if we got to vote "yes or no" on them every four years?

In a little-known Gallup Poll in the 1988 election, 30% of the people that
actually voted said that they would have voted "No confidence" on both Bush
and Dukkakis if there had been a place on the ballot to do that.

And guess how many people, in a CBS Exit Poll, said that they were
dissatisfied with existing nominees: SIXTY-FOUR PERCENT (64%).
So this is not such an unpopular idea...

The last Soviet Union elections were more democratic than ours.
Instead of picking the lesser of two evils, ([like] having to choose between
Feinstein and Wilson for governor and then running to the nearest toilet),
people voted by crossing off all the candidates reject[ed]...so [they] could
even vote out people running unopposed! And no election was valid if less
than half the people voted. The result? Out of 1500 races for the Congress
of People's Deputies, nearly 200 had to be rerun.

But just like over there, getting rid of the crooks and turning things around
for real will probably REQUIRE a revolution. Let's hear it for revolution!
The kind of revolution that the people of Rumania, Czechoslovakia, and
Nicaragua thought was impossible until they actually went out and did it!

The kind that will only happen over here when more people realize that
overthrowing the rich is not just in our own best interest:
it's a hell of a lot of fun!

In the meantime, it's not a bad idea to pay attention and to react to those
local ballot propositions in your own back yard before someone else does it
for you.

And maybe start getting those petitions together to make "No Confidence--None
of the Above" a choice on every ballot on every ballot for every office in the
country.

Wouldn't take that much time, wouldn't take that much money, and it sure as
hell beats staying home...pouting...turning on the television...and being
greeted with Governor Wilson!
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[22 Apr 2005|11:09am]
to be indelicate:

i need to get laid..
3 comments|post comment

[14 Apr 2005|09:31am]
talked to a 3 year old yesterday.. wonderful.. i dig kids.. she told me that a friend of hers was going to be visiting her.. i asked her if he was tall and a bear, but apparently, hes not tall and hes not a bear, and hes a boy.. an older boy.. 4.. i need to find a way to hang out with kids more often.. i dig their honesty..
2 comments|post comment

[25 Mar 2005|11:33pm]
i have so many crushes.. and so many dates.. ive been talking to so many peopel these last two days.. and im beginning to see how great other people are.. and how great i am..
1 comment|post comment

[19 Mar 2005|08:38pm]
i am so high.. i am also at my fathers house.. i am by a tv.. the tv just told me something about touching the rainbow, feeling the rainbow.. my fathers house is not a good place for me.. i showed ryan around the house when he dropped me off here.. i am told him about all the food that was not there, all the rooms without furniture that i slept in, the basement stairs where my dad sometimes threw our dog rex down..
1 comment|post comment

moderately confused [16 Mar 2005|11:56am]
howdy

face less masses of cosmetic bliss and empty presentations of promises..

how are you finding that new tri-cycle.. ??

do you like it??

i think that its a very nice tri-cycle.. i think that if i were capable of making friends, yknow, capable of communicating and being able to share and possess emotions whilst in the presence of another, thAT i would like to be friends with the tri-cycle because its a very direct tri-cycle.. yknow?? it directly gives emotion.. it directly gives fulfillment and enjoyment if you feel like letting it.. if you dont, thats nice too..

i typed the words "i am you. and you are me. and we are all together." in google and i got this website":

http://www.souledout.org/newworldreligion/impressions/pathtopeace/pathpeaceimp.html#cooperation

and i was really excited about it.

these are some of the topics in it:

Principle of Sharing

Principle of Responsibility

Principle of Cooperation

THese topics excite me.. but i dont know the content yet.. but i.. and so i.. but must i never also in addition to besides next to behind..

behind my mind lurks another mind. and behind that mind lurks another mind. and behind that mind lurks another mind. and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x1) and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x2) and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x3) and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x4) and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x5) and behind that mind lurks another mind. (x6)
Assume that x is a factor of not x

Solve for the following:
1. what lurks inside the mind?
2. and does it have any friends?
3. friends that can drive..
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[12 Feb 2005|09:19pm]
dont have much to say..

sort of sad..

sort of empty..

not exceptionally of either..

just sort of am..

stimulus is needed..

activity is required..
---------------------
twisting and being twisted..

blllllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

dwindling and being dwindled..

clevering and being clevered..
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[10 Nov 2004|07:39pm]
three considerations of a poptart:

1. a poptart.

2. a poptart.

3. whats a poptart?

----

lessons in criticism:

1. BAD!

---
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